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Alyssa

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[29 Jul 2005|07:27pm]

So here it is.
I am driving home from a FUCKED up night on Wednesday, and I text Eric Murphy. And ask him if I would be wasting my time, trying to hook up with him. After a nice long conversation, I come to find there would be no wasted time. Then yesterday I spent all day with the boys. And Nate. And that sucked. I didn't talk to him. I didn't really look at him. And he got pissed. He went home. And he's been leacing messages for me in his fucking away messages. Fucking Lame. I don't care. I don't know what to say to him. There is a part of me that does still want to be with him, but there is the bigger part of me that can't go on without the affection that should be there. So I'm going over to Murphy's tonight. Because we have a make out date. Muahahaha.
ANd Lindsey is home...
yayayayayayyyy!!!!!!!!!!
5 comments|post comment

[27 Jul 2005|03:15am]
[ mood | pissed off ]

I HATE BOYS


AgentAlyssa00: youre an asshole. thank you. for deciding to walk away and never speak to me again because well..im not sure. but that doesnt solve anything. there are things that i wanted to talk to you about. listen to your friends. listen to everyone else when they tell you. because i talk to them about it. because they listen. apparently if i tried to talk to you. you would just walk away
AgentAlyssa00: im not trying to hurt your feelings. im not trying to be a bitch.
AgentAlyssa00: but my life cant revolve around an impending relationship
AgentAlyssa00: when i dont see anything there anymore
AgentAlyssa00: ive lost hope in it
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: i didnt walk away i just decided that i would let everything run its course i figured you didnt want any part of me anymore seeing as how you have been kinda dsitant
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: i guess i was wrong
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: i agree with what your saying you shouldnt be in a relationship that has nothing anymore. so if thats the way you fell then alright i wont fight about it or cry over it
AgentAlyssa00: youre not listening to me
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: oh sorry what did i miss
AgentAlyssa00: youre reading what you want to read and youre making into whatever you want it to be.
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: i was agreeing with you
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: what do you want me to say
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: i dont know what to say
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: i know you dont want to see me anymore and i just want to make this as painless as possible for me
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: if this is the way you felt then you should have told me earlier. i mean i had a feeling this is the way you felt but i just decided to let everything take its course. then when you ended up at katies tonight i decided i would just let everything float by and maybe it would all just go away
Auto Response from AgentAlyssa00: "I'm sorry, but tonight I've got to go...." thank you mexican for those wonderful lyrics. call me. I dare you. 6304561387
PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: sorry bout all this if you still want to talk about it im all ears but its probably better off this way
AgentAlyssa00: i dont know what to say to you, nate. i dont think youre capable of understanding why i am and why i have been the way i am. yes, i have been distant, im sorry i cant push all the other problems in my life aside to focus on you. to focus on whatever it is that we have/had that i had no hope in any more. ive been distant because im moving out of my HOME. not my house, my HOME. ricky, the one person i did love, left forever the other day, and we tried talking for hours but nothing got resolved, it only left me with more unanswered questions. i was trying my best to put my all into you but it just wasnt happening. you dont kiss me nate, i kiss you.

Auto response from PaRaNo1A Ag3nT: whats the worst that i can say?
things are better off this way....
so long and good night
so long and goodnight

hey this song kinda fits the situation.

AgentAlyssa00: and im just not down with that
AgentAlyssa00: i dont think i can do it any longer and i have been wanting to say something but i couldnt because i didnt know how to say it without sounding like a creep and without hurting your feelings. you think youre saving yourself hurt by just walking away? what about me? if josh didnt tell me thats what you r were planning on doing, i wouldve been more hurt than you can imagine, because i would have had no idea.
AgentAlyssa00: you try to put this all on me, like im the one not wanting to be with you or around you anymore, but i think its been you from the start. for some reason or another you wanted nothing to do with me if it ever came to a relationship. but then we got stuck somehow in between. and now what? now what do we do?





------------------

SO NOW WHAT?!?!?!

Grr. I need to sleep. Fucking burger day. Gay shit I tell you, gay fucking shit.
2 comments|post comment

[24 Jul 2005|10:33pm]
[ mood | apathetic ]


Well I guess it's been a while.
Not much has really happened. Nothing exciting. The anger faded from the fight, and Garry and I are friends again. And it makes me happy. Things still have gone no where with Nate. And honestly, I find myself losing faith and hope in it, and I'm just not caring. That makes me really sad because I would like to to be something. But there is just NOTHING when we kiss. Or...when I kiss him. Lindsey and I have been able to hang out a bit more and we've been talking. So in that sense, things are good. Katie and been talking incessantly about Eric. I'm not allowed to have a bad day because the 5 minutes I need to vent takes away from the 3 hours she needs to tell me about this one hair on Eric's head that is seriously different from the rest of his 75000 hairs. A few days ago Rick came over. Yeah. Ricky. We sat and talked for about three hours. And then he left. And now he's gone. No phone, no car, no license. And he is starting over away from here. Katie knew he was over. Katie knew I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. So I call her up and she says "Let's drive and you talk" so I pick her up at 1145 at night, knowing I have to be at work at 7 the next morning. I don't get more that 5 WORDS out before it somehow relates or reminds her of Eric and she does nothing but talk about him for an hour before I get fed up and take her home. I said nothing, I vented nothing, I got nothing off of my chest. When something HUGE just happened in my life. I love her, I do. I keep telling myself that. But it is just getting ridiculous.
My mom wrote me a letter, about how ungrateful, and uncompassionate I am, etc. And now I have to pay rent. But I have limited kitchen and bathroom priveleges. So Dustin, being the great friend that he is, tells me he will move out with me. So we search for apartments. And we get one. August 6th is our move in date. I haven't really told my mom, but I've hinted. To which she has said that I don't get my bed and I will have no health insurance, etc. etc. Even though I am covered under my DAD'S plan until I'm 25. Since she doesn't work and really it's not her decision. So whatever. I knew she wasn't going to give me my bed, because she's a bitch. So I'm going to try and talk to her about still paying her rent to let me keep my bed and to let me stay on my dad's plan.
Yesterday went to Warped. I really don't feel like going into details because I'm tired. But I got to see Saosin AND Atreyu, so all in all it was a successful day. And I survived an Atreyu pit for 45 minutes. I loved it. And I saved some guys life during Fall Out Boy. He was hot. FOB IS for lovers, hhahahahaha.
I also chopped off my hair.
I also love that.
Goodnight.

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[07 Jul 2005|10:28am]

You know what's pretty fucking lame?
THat everyone is mad at Nate for the fight. My parents said he is NEVER allowed at my house again, and I have one week to move out of my house.
WHAT THE FUCK!?
I LOATHE my god damned parents right now.
Katie's being all bitchy and I don't ever WANT to deal with that stupid bullshit right now. My mom and dad think I got the shit beat out of me, when I did wayyy more damage to Garry then he did to me. Really. He has chucnks of skin missing, cuts everywhere, and he was definatly bleeding. I just ave a bruised leg. That's it. And I'm a little sore. But whatever. Fuck my parents. They are both out of their minds. I was so pissed last niht. I told my mom I was going to hang out with LIndsey because she had already told me she didn't like Nate anymore. So whatever. I went over to Nate's. Then we went over to Charles' and then Garry and Murphy came over, I fell asleep, and then woke up and the next thing I know it's 11 and Dustin called NAte and then I call my mom and she didn't sound pissed but she was lik e"Just so you know, Nate is never ever allowed over here again." "WHY!?" "well because youre "not" boyfriend stood there and watched while you got the shit beat out of you" "WHAT?! YOURE CRAZY" and I hung up. I got home and tore my house apart and screamed with my parents and then they told me that I was beat severly blah blah blah. I wasn't. Has anyone compared Garry and I? yeah...I'm pretty sure I won the fight.
Fucking lunatics.
2 comments|post comment

I have to waste my time some how [29 Jun 2005|12:31pm]
START TIME: 1231 pm
LAST PERSON WHO...

x. Slept in your bed other than yourself: katie

x. Saw you cry: uhh katie

x. Made you cry: my mom

x. You shared a drink with: dawn

x. You went to the movies with: nate & dawn

x. You went to the mall with: lindsey

x. Sent you an email: martin


HAVE YOU EVER...

x. Said "I Love You" and meant it: to my parents?

x. Gotten in a fight: duh

x. Been to New York: no

x. Florida: Yes

x. California: "california we didn't go..." haha

x. Hawaii: Nope

x. Mexico: Nope

x. China: No

x. Canada: no

x. Danced naked: yes

x. Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: no

x. Wish you were the opposite sex: sometimes

x. Had an imaginary friend:yes

RANDOM

x. Red or blue: red

x. Spring or Fall: fall

x. Are you bored: yes

x. Last noise you heard: 15 minutes late doing the cover of "to be with you"

x. Last time you went out of the state: don't remember

x. Things you like in a girl/guy: not acting different when we are alone or if we are with his friends, smile, personality, if they make me laugh

x. What book are you reading now:the third book in the gunslinger series


x. Worst feeling in the world: someone hating you for no reason in the world. someone tryign to fuck up your happiness

x. What is the first thing u think in the morning: NO!

x. Future daughter's name: vegas

x. Future son's name: ian

x. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: yes

x. If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be: porn star

x. Are you a lefty, righty: righty

x. Do you type with your fingers on the right keys: yep

x. What's under your bed: chuckie!

x. favorite sports to play: soccer

x. Current Age: 18 (2 more months until I'm old!!)

x. Siblings: little brother...Britton

x. Location: my house

x. College plans: Aurora University

x. Piercings: 5 in my ears, nose


EXTRA STUFF

x. Do you drink: yes

x. Who is your best friend: katie, and my mccrew

x. What kind of shampoo and conditioner do you use: herbel essence

x. What are you most scared of: being alone and not being happy

x. What clothes do you sleep in: you know

x. Who is the last person who called you: nate

x. Where do you want to get married: on a beach in the summer. <333333333

x. Who do you really hate: eric


x. Favorite number: 6

x. What type automobile do you drive: 2001 black mercury cougar <333333333333333333333

x. Are you timely or always late:meh

x. Do you have a job: mcmanager lol

x. Best feeling in the world: cuddling and holding hands, hahaha

x. are you a health freak: negative

STUFF

x. Have you ever loved someone you had no chance with: thatsnot love

x Have you ever cried over something someone of the opposite sex did: yeah

x. Do you have a "type" of person you always go after: not really. look at my track record, ricky, tony, the mexican, nate. hmmm


x. Want someone you don't have right now: no. I'm content. ^.^

x. Are you lonely right now: no.

x. Ever afraid you'll never get married: sometimes

x. Ever want kids? not really


FAVORITE!!

x. Room in house: my room

x. Type(s) of music: all of it

x. Memory: all my memories rock. getting pierced TWICE, haha, the fort, being suspended, disney, nates face being set on fire, prarie fest TWO years in a row, carnivals, midnight drives with sunglasses on, moulin rouge sing alongs....

x. Day of the week: any day that I have off

x. Color: green

x. Perfume or cologne: ralh lauren
IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU:

x. Cried: no

x. Bought something: no

x. Gotten sick: yes

x. Sung: yes

x. Said "I Love You": no

x. Wanted to tell someone you loved them: no

x. Met someone new: yes

x. Talked to someone: yes

x. Missed someone: Yes.

x. Hugged someone: yes

x. Kissed someone: yes

x. Dreamt about someone you can't be with: no

x. Had a lot of sleep: meh

HAVE YOU EVER...

x. been drunk: yes

x. smoked pot: yes

x. kissed a member of the opposite sex: yes

x. kissed a member of the same sex: yes

x. crashed a friend's car: no

x. been to japan: No

x. ridden in a taxi: yes

x. had anal sex: hell no

x. been in love: yes

x. been dumped: yes

x. shoplifted: yes.

x. been fired: yes

x. been in a fist fight: yes

x. snuck out of my parent's house: yes

x. been tied up (sexually): no

x. been caught masturbating: no

x. pissed on myself: no

x. been arrested: yes

x stole something from my job: nope

x.celebrated new years in time square: not yet

x. gone on a blind date: no

x. lied to a friend: yes


x. had a crush on a teacher: uh hahah

x. celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans: no

x. been to europe: no

x. skipped school: yeah

x. slept with a co-worker: hahahahahhaha

x. had sex at the office: no

x. been married: no

x. had children: no

x. stripped at a party: not really.

x. literally crawled to your house drunk: no

x. jumped off a bridge: no


x. had a mullet: no

x. peed in public: no

TIME FINISHED: 1244
1 comment|post comment

[29 Jun 2005|01:51am]
[ mood | confused ]

uhhhhhh....
what happened?
post comment

[28 Jun 2005|01:42pm]

Survey #3: Just One Word

Oh, surveys take so fucking long to fill out sometimes. So, here you go, sparky, answer and/or sum up shit with one word. Not two or three or four, but ONE.

YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS: Non-exsistent

YOUR CAR IS: SWEET

YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER IS: imaginary

YOUR SEXLIFE IS: gone

YOUR CONFIDENCE IS: ridiculous

YOUR JOB IS: awesome

YOUR LIFE ASPIRATION IS: fantastical

YOUR MUSCIAL TASTE IS: broad

YOUR HOBBIES ARE: boring

YOUR PET(S) ARE/IS: catsdogbunnymouse

YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH PARENTS: sucks

YOUR GAMING ABILITY IS: good

YOUR CREATIVE ABILITY IS: great

YOUR TALENT: giggling

YOUR HOPE: love

YOUR FAVORITEST PERSON IN THE WORLD: myself

YOUR FAVORITEST LUBE IN THE WORLD: spit

FAVORITE ANIME MOVIE: final fantasy

FAVORITE ANIME SERIES: pokemon HAHAHAHAH

FAVORITE AUTHOR: stephen king

REASON FOR LIVING: reflection

PLASTIC OR PAPER....APPLICATOR: plastic

SEXUAL PREFERENCE: boys

SEXUAL PREFERENCE EVERYONE ELSE THINKS YOU HAVE: little boys

GREEN? grass


-------------


Survey #1: For People Out of Junior High School

SECTION ONE: CHILDHOOD ASPIRATIONS AND PORN

1. YOUR LIFE ASPIRATION AS A CHILD: to be a veternarian
2. YOUR VIEWS ON YOUR CHILDHOOD LIFETIME ASPIRATIONS: I wish I still wanted to be one, at least I would know where I was going. Too bad I love animals more than people, so I could never watch them suffer
3. COULD YOU SEE THOSE SAME ASPIRATIONS AS A PORN MOVIE? not really. But I would be in one.
4. HOW FAR IS YOUR CURRENT STATION IN LIFE FROM THOSE CHIDHOOD ASPIRATIONS? I don't even know where I'm going right now.
5. WOULD YOU RATHER JUST BE A PORN STAR? yes. very much so.
6. IF YOU WERE IN PORN, WHAT KIND OF PORN WOULD YOU MAKE? hot porn. hahah. I bet it'd be something gay with blondes.
7. WHAT WOULD YOU CALL YOUR PORN MOVIE? I dunno
8. IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB/CAREER (INCLUDING PORN) WHAT WOULD IT BE? play boy bunny. that's right. my job would be walking around that mansion, all day.
9. AMATEUR PORN FOR HOME USE, YES OR NO? yes

SECTION TWO: WORK AND JESUS

1. DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD? no
2. WHEN DO YOU CALL ON GOD MORE, DURING SEX OR WHEN FRUSTRATED? when sexually frustrated, haha
3. IF GOD ACTUALLY SHOWED UP WHILE YOU WERE SAYING "OH, GOD" IN BED, WHAT EXACTLY WOULD YOU DO? bust a nut.
4. QUIET. NO ONE'S LOOKING. ACROSS FROM YOU IS YOUR FRIEND THE WANNABE HIPPY, WICCAN, SAVE THE DOLPHINS FROM THE WHALES, BAN BRAS, MOTHER EARTH, CALL ON THE GODDESS SORT OF PERSON. YOU HAVE THIS SINGLE CHANCE TO DO/SAY ANYTHING TO THEM WITHOUT ANYONE KNOWING IT WAS YOU. WHAT DO YOU DO? slap them and tell them to put on a bra, go shop at Target, and put on some make up because they're looking haggard.
6. WHILE AT WORK, YOUR EXTREMELY RELIGIOUS COWORKER PROCEEDS TO ENGAGE YOU ABOUT YOUR LACK OF RELIGION, WHAT DO YOU DO? punch them
7. YOU'VE BEEN LEFT BEHIND AND THE END IS NIGH. PANIC, FIND JESUS, OR PARTY? party
8. YOUR FIRST THOUGHTS UPON ARRIVING AT WORK I want to go home. ANd no one better bitch about their food today or I might punch them
9. YOUR LAST THOUGHTS BEFORE LEAVING WORK thank you jesus. haha
10. APPROXIMATE TIME YOU START COUNTING HOW LONG UNTIL LUNCH before I even get to work
11. COFFEE AT WORK. YES, NO, OR THE WORLD WILL END WITHOUT IT? I hate coffee
12. YOUR SALARY. UNDERPAID, ADEQUATELY PAID, OR PLEASE GOD LET ME WIN THE LOTTERY? please god, let me win the lottery
13. WOULD YOU MAKE MORE MONEY AT YOUR JOB IF YOU WERE JESUS? probably not
14. WOULD YOU MAKE MORE MONEY IF YOU SLEPT WITH THE BOSS? haha probably
15. IS MAKING MORE MONEY WORTH SLEEPING WITH THE BOSS? just looking at the boss is worth sleeping with him. He's hot.

SECTION THREE: SPIRITUAL, SEXUAL HODGEPODGE OF LIFE

1. DO YOU HAVE A CAR? yes
2. IF SO, DO YOU LOVE YOUR CAR? YES
3. IF YOU'RE A NAMER OF CARS, WHAT DID YOU NAME IT?
4. HAVE YOU BEEN SEXUAL IN YOUR CAR? not yet
5. ON YOUR CAR? no
6. WITH YOUR CAR? yes
7. LUBE. YES, NO, OR WHOOHOOOO? you know
8. YOU'VE JUST DIED AND HAVE DISCOVERED THAT IN HEAVEN YOU GET TO CHOOSE TO BE ANY ANIME CHARACTER. WHO DO YOU CHOOSE? zell
9. YOU'VE JUST DIED AND HAVE DISCOVERED THAT IN HELL YOU SUCK GWB'S COCK. HOW LONG UNTIL YOU REPENT? .000000000000000001 seconds
10. CONSIDER YOUR LOVER/SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT HUMAN. WORTH DYING FOR? umm...
11. WORTH SITTING THROUGH A SEASON OF SURVIVOR FOR? yes
12. IF THEY'RE WORTH DYING FOR, BUT NOT WATCHING SURVIVOR FOR, WOULD THEY ASSIST YOU IN THE STALKING AND MURDER OF EVERYONE ASSOCIATED WITH THE CREATION OF SURVIVOR? probably
13. YOU'RE STUCK ON AN ISLAND WITH YOUR LOVER/SPOUSE/BUTT BUDDY AND ONE ITEM. WHAT ITEM IS IT? a coat hanger. think about it
14. YOUR LOVER HAS BEEN TURNED INTO A CHICKEN. NOW WHAT? can I have sex with a chicken?
15. THE FUCK? CHICKEN?
16. FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION
17. FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION WHEN YOU HAVE RUGBURN ON YOUR KNEES
18. FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION WITH A CHICKEN
19. FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION WITH A RACING CHICKEN THAT'S SUSPICIOUSLY LIKE THE DAMNED FINAL FANTASY BIRDS?
20. HOW MANY HOURS HAVE YOU PERSONALLY SPENT INVOLVED IN THE BREEDING OF SAID DAMNED FF BIRDS?
21. DID IT TURN YOU ON OR JUST MAKE YOU CLINICALLY INSANE?

SECTION FOUR: GOD DAMNED STUPID SHIT

1. PICK A COLOR green
2. PICK A CONDOM not used
3. PICK A SONG I Can Tell - Saosin
4. PICK A VACATION DESTINATION florida
5. CAN YOU ENVISION YOURSELF HAVING SEX WITH THE COLORED CONDOM YOU CHOSE IN THE DESTINATION YOU PICKED WHILE LISTENING TO SAID SONG? yes
6. NEW LAW DICTATES THAT YOU HAVE TO HAVE A GAI AND SILLY INTERNET CYBERPET OR YOU'LL HAVE YOUR GENITALS REMOVED WITH A RED HOT POKER AND A SPOON. WHAT DO YOU PICK? your mom
7. BIRD OR FISH? bird
8. THE ABOVE-AS A PET OR AS DINNER? pet
9. WHAT YOU'RE BEST AT beating people up
10. WHAT YOU SUCK AT not beating people up
11. WHAT YOU REALLY FUCKING SUCK AT that R word



----------


that's all.
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^.^ [23 Jun 2005|11:57pm]
[ mood | happy ]

quick update because I need to go to sleep since I have to go to work in the AM.

I adore Nate. I really do.
I was pissed because I felt like I couldn't tell my best friend how much I really was starting to like him, because she just makes fun of me or talks about her 32 year old lover. But then I realized I have even better friends in my mc-coworkers. It makes me all warm and tingly inside. I really really really really am happy though. I was actually floored when I sat down and had a minute to think about it. It's okay when we sit and do absuoltely nothing but listen to everyone else. I just like being next to him.^.^
Am I a sick individual yet? haha.I don't know how he feel about anything though. I'm scared to find out. Sort of scared. But a lot more ready for it than I ever have been. With anybody. Hmm.I don't even care if Katie isn't happy with it. The only thing that upsets me is his brother and how much he hates ME. It shouldn't be me that he hates AT ALL. Guilty by fucking association. I can't even try and talk to him because he will just yell and scream. Probably attack me. Ugh. Always has to be some sort of obstacle in my fucking way. And that makes me pissed.

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laaaaaaaaaaaaa [13 Jun 2005|08:22pm]
[ mood | bored ]

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Im pretty bored.
I adore Mike and his face.
He's such a sweetheart. He really is.
Yesterday I got home from work at like 430, took a shower, fed my mouse and went to sleep. I then woke up today at 10 am.
SCHWEET!

Then I was outside reading for four hours, and burnt my whole front side. No so sweet.
meh.

I gave you 20 minutes fro sex and you played MTV cribs!?Collapse )
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damn... [12 Jun 2005|05:01pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]


Let's see.
Drama at Katie's grad party yesterday.
Her 32 year old lover threatened my life.
And she yelled at me for it.
Yelled at ME for this guy telling me he was going to kill me.

?don't get it?

Yeah. Whatever,
so then, I'm just drivin around and Mike texted me.
Cute boy.
Yeah.
Went over to his house last night.
I forgot how cute he was.
Dumb
but cute.
I didn't have sex with him though.
I was too skurred.
=/
Plates.
Plates.
Plates.

OH YEAH!!!
Josh told me he really liked me.
So I freaked.
And now am running.
Would anyone expect anything less of me?
Everyone knows thats the fastest way to make me run away.
Jebus.

So now I'm grounded until I'm about 22.
Because my mom said for every minutes I was late past 12 it was a week of being grounded.
I didn't get home until about 3.
Schweet.

Sleep time.

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you're embarrassing you.... [09 Jun 2005|12:34am]
[ mood | bored ]


WOW!
fuckin' WOW.
Yesterday...not one, but TWO fights at the old golden arches.
FUckin McSweet.
First one between two of our grill people, then next between Garrett and this kid Steve who always talks shit.
I love Garrett and I'm happy he's my friend.

So...
there was tons of McDrama with the McJew.

It was ricockulous.
I don't think...nor does anyone else...that I got overly upset for no reason.
You just don't call someone dirty.
ESPECIALLY someone you don't even know much about...
or someone who has a thing for you.
IDIOT!!

But it was all resolved, because well...
I'm an asshole.
I adore Nate though.
And I hate that him and Josh are friends.
It ruins everything.
EVERYTHING.
Fuckin...fucks.
Jesus.
Today was rather productive.

I went shopping with my mom.
She thought it would be funny to buy be a steering wheel cover...that was Barbie.
Damn straight I put that shit in my car.
hhahaha.
I AM Barbie....bitches.
Then we went and got TONS of good stuff for my grad party.
June 26th.
Be there.
And be drunk.

Hmm...then I went to Target with Katie...
got a cute new swim suit.
I like it.

Nate called me.
I LOVED it...
is that weird?
man.

Watched movies...ate some food...now I'm sitting here.
Vegetating.
Yep.
I have to go to sleep.
I have to work at 9 tomorrow.
EWWW.

McPeace

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too long in the same place........ [03 Jun 2005|03:20am]
[ mood | awake ]


it's 320 in the morning

AND I CAN'T SLEEP!!!!!!!



wtf?! this is some GAY shit.
I have to wake up at like 9 and call lindsey ot see if we're still going to iHOP.
be alimo service to my friends from work that need a ride,
go to Wheaton to hang out with my boys and watch some bands rock out.

DRINK HEAVILY WITH A JEW
Pick up a jew from work on Saturday, sleep alot, run to the Bean to see my Inept boys rock out acoustic, get back hom efor another hour of sleep...

then get drunk with my store manager during the 3rd shift at McWork.

MCSWEET!

How about some more pictures?
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

there was this one time, when we drove around town, throwing 1000's of fliers out the windows, and this one was sweet and made love to my finger.


Image hosted by Photobucket.com
we honest to god found this place just driving around. when I said it outloud, Katie nearly drove off the road.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
There's that mexican I was in love with for 5 minutes. He was reading...AND I CAUGHT HIM!

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

yeah...silly string fight...b-izzles
1 comment|post comment

[31 May 2005|01:40pm]
Well...
It's about damn time I got myself a car!!!!!!
And it's nicer than both my parents' cars. HAHAHAHHAHAH
Fuckers.

I now have 54 dollars in my checking account.
And i signed my life away.
My mom is STILL screaming at me for it.
But last time I checked, not one penny of her money went into it.
And she said I now have to start paying rent.

WHAT A PSYCHOTIC BITCH!

I'm hungry.
And tired
and I don't want to go to work.

P-IZZLE
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[30 May 2005|11:56pm]


Your Rising Sign is Virgo









Well put-together and elegant, you sometimes seem standoffish.

And truth be told, sometimes you do feel superior to those around you.



A bit shy and introverted, you tend to stay quiet - even if you're feeling social.

At parties, you can seem like you're very serious while you're having fun.



You clever and ingenious, with an alert and active mind.

Good at facts and figures, you excel at logical and mathematical tasks.





Your Rising Sign is Virgo









Well put-together and elegant, you sometimes seem standoffish.

And truth be told, sometimes you do feel superior to those around you.



A bit shy and introverted, you tend to stay quiet - even if you're feeling social.

At parties, you can seem like you're very serious while you're having fun.



You clever and ingenious, with an alert and active mind.

Good at facts and figures, you excel at logical and mathematical tasks.


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[25 May 2005|02:07pm]

I'M DONE WITH HIGHSCHOOL, BITCHES!
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[19 May 2005|11:20pm]

The Keys to Your Heart



You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.





----------------


I hate the world. Bastards.
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[07 May 2005|09:11pm]
[ mood | not drunk enough ]


man. I'm supposed to be in dekalb right now, celebrating my Jenny's birthday AND seeing my Nicolasa!!!
I'll probably just steal alot of my parents beer and drink myself to sleep, and stumble into work as I do every saturday and sunday morning.
Today I had to go wake Nolan up because he was sleeping in his car. He worked a double shift. 10pm-about noon or 1 today.
He's my favorite, haha. This morning he was like "So Mike tells me you get a little frisky when you've been drinking?"
and I was like "what?!"
and he goes "I don't know if it was a tip or a warning" and I said it was a tip. then Mike was like "aren't you two working the overnights together next weekend?"
and Nolan goes "I'm bringing beer"
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

haha.
This morning at like 2 am Nicole called me and she was partying and with Carlos. I miss them both. =/
I hate falling out of touch with people that matter.
I asked Nolan that if once I was certified can I help him do the crew schedules so I can choose who works with me all the time. He said yes. But there has to be more girls than just me and tyler, lol. He said he wants work done to the store, not on the boys.

hmm. My mom is also a psychotic bitch. And I hate her.
I really do.
I need to move out. Well...find a boyfriend and moveout with him, lol. ::whore::
In other news, there's an escaped bunny in our house. He shits everywhere.
It's like a zoo in here.

that's all I got.

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[06 May 2005|11:55pm]
[ mood | distressed ]


My head is killing me. So is my heart.
So is my kidney, haha.
I have to be at work in 7 hours.
RIDICULOUS.
I hate work. I hate working early mornings.
*sigh*

Found out some rather disturbing news yesterday. Sweet.

I wish I had somebody to talk to sometimes, ya know? Katie just won't listen always. It's nice to be able to go to work though, and have people who only know me from that environment always asking if I'm okay, and if I want to talk about anything. But that may also because they're naive 16 year olds. So cute. Why am I so old? lol

Fuck...I gotta go to sleep.

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[02 May 2005|10:14pm]
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

I love my friends.
My friends now.
Not my friends then.

Yeah.
Bitch.



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bkjhfdbsjk [27 Apr 2005|12:09am]
[ mood | exhausted ]


I am ridiculously tired, but beceause I don't have to go to school tomorrow, I refuse to go to bed. haha. I closed tonight at work. And we got everything done and cleaned by 1030...so I got to go home at like 1045. And tomorrow I was supposed to work 12-8 but I'm working 5-close for Garrett instead because of his testing. SWEET!! hhahaha. let's see....
yep.
I got horribly depressed tonight because of a picture I saw. It sucks. I'm getting over it though, talking with my cute boy. ^.^
I can't hold my head up any longer.
p-izzle

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